父親是2012年元月二日下午5時走的。他在世時，我們很少相聚， 也從未親近過。因他對我動輒打罵，我從小怕他，進而由害怕生厭惡，由厭惡生蔑視，一生都覺得他不是個正常父親。可是，自他去世後，我每次想到他，都倍感他親切可敬，每次都眼淚轉角。我理解， 這便是人間親情。我用英文寫過上十首詩專門紀念他，大概因情真意切，都被較為著名的英文文學雜 發表過。
日前在網上瀏覽，偶然發現以下這首詩竟然獲美國著名文學雜 《莫比爾詩刊》提名為全美著名“小推車”文學獎2012年候選詩，雖最終未能獲獎，足已令人欣慰。現將原詩及中文譯文貼出，可為分享，也為存檔，更為對亡父的懷念。
Kinship: For Yuan Hongqi
Yes, we are father and son, but so often
Did I doubt this simple small biofact:
We could never say more than three short
Sentences to each other when we met, nor
Did we meet more than three times per year
Before I managed to flee a thousand miles
Away from you, and later ten thousand away
From your village on this world's other side
Like other Chinese fathers, you never said
You loved me, gave me a hug, or touched me
Unless it was a cutting pinch in the arm
Or a heavy hit on the butt, (always in surprise)
While my peers kept bragging aloud
About their great fathers, grandfathers
I looked down upon you, not because of
Your slight stature, but because of your
Smaller personality, constantly calling you
"A Buddha outside, a Devil at home"
(Of course behind your back), so I used to
Feel guilty, fearing I could never shed
Any teardrops when you die, just as every
True Confucian son is supposed to
Unlike me and my son, with a big store of
Co-memories ready to share, to cherish
We were born enemies, karma-determined
In our former lives, just as you had explained
To my mother, (who would be busy filling
In each new crack on our wall, with a big pail
Of muddy mixture every time we met)
Yet ever since your death at the dawn of 2012
I have been haunted by your image, kindly
Smiling, and even sobbed my heart out
While dreaming last night: are you there, Dad?
[First published in Mobius: The Poetry Magazine]
親情︰寫給袁宏啟
沒錯，你我確系父子，不過我常常
懷疑這一簡單的生物學事實︰
每次相聚，我們難能說完三句短話
而一年到頭我們見面也不過三次
那還是我在世界的另一邊
逃避你千里萬里之前
像其他中國父親，你從未說過
你愛我，擁抱過觸摸過我
除非是深掐臂膀
或痛打屁股，（總是冷不及防）
當我的同伴大聲吹噓
他們的爸爸爺爺如何了得，我卻
瞧不起你，不是因為
你身量矮小，而是因為
你性格怯弱。我時時（在你背後）說你
‘在外是活菩薩，在家是活閻王’
因為這，我深深內疚，唯恐不能像個
真正的儒家孝子在你離世時為你落淚
不像我和我的兒子，總有許多共同往事
分享回憶，我你乃天生對頭
前世注定，一如你向我母親訴說的
那樣。（每當我倆相見
她總是擰著個大桶， 隨時在你我之間的
高牆上填縫補隙）
可是，自從2012年年初你撒手人寰
你的形象一直追纏著我，慈愛的
微笑，每每使我泣不成聲
昨夜還夢見︰你在麼，爸？
--------------------------
我一共5次被提名獲美國著名“小推車”文學獎。以下順便貼出存檔：：
1. "Kinship: for Yuan Hongqi." nominated by Mobius for a Pushcart Prize for 2012 [鏈接link:: http://www.mobiuspoetry.com/prizeawards.htm];
2. "SAWS: A Seasonal Poem," nominated by Wilderness House Literary Review for a Pushcart prize for 2011. [鏈接 link:: http://www.fictionaut.com/forums/general/threads/1448];
3. "Word Collage: A Democratic Poem," nominated by Carcinogenic Poetry (Virgogray Press) for a Puschcart prize for 2010. [鏈接 link:: http://virgograypress.com/2010/11/25/2010-virgogray-press-pushcart-prize-nominees/];
4. "S. E. W. N," nominated by Blue Fifth Review for a Pushcart Prize for 2009. [鏈接 http://samofthetenthousandthings.blogspot.com/2009/11/bfrs-pushcart-nominations.html]. Also, originally published by BFR, my poem "Last Single Sale" was selected for inclusion in Best New Poems Online;
5. "Chansons of a Chinaman," nominated by my first poetry book publisher Leaf Garden Press for a Pushcart Prize for 2009. [鏈接 link:: http://leafgardenpress.blogspot.com/].
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